Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Choosing Surrender

It has been a long week and it is only Tuesday....I went into the Dr. yesterday with hopes and plans of being induced this week....so far that is not happening. I go back to see him on Friday and I am praying that something changes. Please pray with me!

So here i sit, 39 weeks pregnant, getting some pretty crazy ideas about how to make myself go into labor.

To pass the time Parker and I have been playing lots of slap jack....yeah, the card game. He learned it at his grandparent's house this weekend and seriously would sit and play cards for hours on end. I am finding it to be a good tool to teach him his numbers....and as an added bonus I can just sit in a chair and not move. So then after not moving for an hour we head down to the basement and take turns walking on the treadmill....and then that makes us hungry so we have to have a snack and play slap jack again....

Sean and I spent last weekend cleaning the house, going out for our "last date", and battling the dreaded stomach flu.....again! Seriously, this is the second time it has been a guest in our house this winter and I am SICK of being SICK!

I think the reason I am most frustrated that I am not being induced this week is because the house was spotless, the laundry was done, and the groceries were put away, and now we have to live here another week before the baby comes.....so the house will get dirty, the laundry will need washed, and the groceries will get eaten! Yes, I know, the many logical worries of 39 week pregnant woman. I guess I shouldn't have been praying so hard for a relaxed and laid back child this time around.......seems that he is a little too laid back....

Once again God is showing me that I have no control over soooooo many things in my life and once again I am resisting the lesson and choosing to cling to my frustration....and that is just what it is, my choice.

Lord, please help me let go of my frustration and choose surrender!

.....and here he goes again with the hiccups for the 45th time today....

1 comment:

Nicole said...

Hey Jess. I was thinking about you today wondering how you are doing and here you are blogging about how you are doing.

I am praying with you friend. I don't have any children and there are things in my life that I like to have "just right" before certain other things will happen. I'm with you on the clean house, laundry (although I don't know the last time that was all done), and groceries put away. Keeping trusting. I am praying that your desires become His, and that you truly desire them deep in your heart. Jesus loves you soo much Jess! I am thinking of a verse right now but can't remember it 100% correctly and can't remember where it's at. Pretty much it says that no discipline is fun at the time but in the end it is worth it. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think your discipline would be surrender, yes, but patience also.

Try to remember that at the center of everything that God does, His motivation is His deep love for us. I am so thankful for that!!! Whenever I am experiencing pain I try to remember God's love for me. It is so deep and so wide and so long. I pray you feel it today when your little one is hiccuping for the 46th time.:)


Love you friend!. So excited to see pictures of that little guy!

Traveling this journey with you,
Nicole